Here’s what to tell victims of bullying
Here’s what to tell victims of bullying
If you suspect a child is a victim of bullying, ask the following questions, advises Terri Richards, RN, MA, an ED nurse at Children’s Hospital in Columbus, OH, and a school nurse at Teays Valley Schools in Ashville, OH:
- People frequently become ill as a result of the stress and fear caused by threats, taunting, or name-calling. Is this something that is happening to you?
- Are there any people making threats to you?
- Are you being threatened in any way?
- Have you ever been teased or threatened at school? Home? Anywhere else?
- What kind of things are you teased about? What threats have been made?
- Who is making the threats? One or more persons?
- Where does it happen? Just at school or at home as well?
- At recess, whom do you play with?
- Do any adults know? Who have you told?
- Have any threats actually been carried out?
- Are there any witnesses?
- How long has this been going on?
- Is anyone else being bullied?
If a child acknowledges being bullied, Kate Reeves, RN, MA, CHPN, former administrative director of the ED at St. Joseph Hospital in Orange, CA, recommends saying the following:
"Do not allow yourself to be a victim. Arguing or fighting back can only escalate the situation. If the bullying is physical, try to avoid any situation where you will be alone with the bully. Do not let him or her have the opportunity to bully you. Don’t act scared. Stand up straight and tall and look the bully in the eye. But do not place yourself in jeopardy. If the situation is serious, it may require intervention by other people. Go to a teacher, a friend’s parent, the principal, a counselor, and/or your parents. Finally, remember you do not deserve to be bullied. Nobody does. Don’t live with it, or think that it’s something you’re doing wrong. You are a great person, so put the end to the bullying now."
Reeves recommends giving parents the following strategies:
1. Discuss this with the child’s teacher, principal, school nurse, and guidance counselor.
2. If you are not happy with the school’s response, do not give up. There are other resources and help available, including the school board, school attorney, and local law enforcement. The key is not to give up.
3. Support and understanding at home are important in helping the child cope with the bullying. Spend time with your child. Show him or her in words and actions that he or she is valued.
4. Remember the health care professional is there to help you and your child.
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